What Book I Am Reading

As a writer, I am also a reader.  With stepping into a new genre of writing expanding on what I know is essential. Writers are great when it comes to giving a reading list to others. My current book is Techniques Of The Selling Writer by Dwight Swain. This book recommendation came from Kylie Gable. It talks about how to lay out a story and build conflict. The most exciting part for me was the writer who is from Norman Oklahoma. As a southern/midwestern girl, it is always great to see someone semi-local who is a good selling author no matter what the genre.  I have a long list of books to read and a short list of hours available to read them. This has always been an issue in my life I have yet to find a solution.  Even though time to read still plagues me feel free to tell me about your current read or favorite. Yes, that includes erotics!

Role Play Vs Real Play

I am a lifestyler, so that means I have done both real play and role play. Real play and role play are both fun and sexually stimulating. Humans need the mental aspect of sexuality. The physical point of being touched by someone is not what creates an intense orgasm. It is the tease that builds up the intensity of how we react to a partner. Humans are complicated yet simple. Think about the first time you were involved in a sexual interaction. Most of us have a long time of trying to get from one aspect of sexuality to another. The whole baseball comparison of first base, second base, and the home run it cliche but explains the tease/denial aspect.  I have had people tell me there is no connection between role play and real play that is untrue. I have had a real play that was disappointing. There has been roleplaying over the years in which the orgasm was intense. It is the interaction of the people involved and how much they invest into the situation that determines its outcome.

Read an article on marriage and ti will tell people that sex gets better for people involved in a relationship. Being in a relationship can be great, or it can be horrid. Over the years people have told me they do not share the kinks with their partner about the intriguing fantasies they have. I would not want to be with someone I could not open up to.  If a person is in a relationship that offers sexual exploration, then it would be great for sexuality. If a person feels the need to hide certain parts of who they are then they will withdraw from the relationship and sexuality will suffer.  It is not necessary for my mind to have a romantic relationship to have a sexual relationship. I have played with several people over the years who I enjoyed but would not have wanted to spend every day in the company of.

When it comes to role play (I am defining this as two people in two different locations in this instance) in my experience, this can be just as wonderful if not more so than real play. Over the years I have talked to some fun individuals even though we were hundred if not thousand of miles our play time proved to be sexually stimulating.  After being around human sexuality of people, I do not have an intimate daily relationship with I have discovered there can be role play that is intense.  I have some people that I have talked to for over eleven years they have shared with me intimate, deep parts of their life. I know more about them then their stream of significant other through all that time. While we may not have the daily connection due to our strict relationship limited by circumstances the understanding of sexuality is intense. Most of the time these fetishes are innocent. A lot of men are into panties, pantyhose, being tied up, or different roles where women are in control. I enjoy hearing about them, and it saddens me in a lot of ways to think they do not have a level of comfort to share. Explore the parts of yourself even if you are not sure how it will be received understand that many have already traveled that road. Be yourself be open and surround yourself with people who adore you for you, not for your sexuality.

How Did I Become Dominant

Everyone asks me when I found out I was dominant and the answer to the question is there was never a time in my life I was not dominant. Even as a young child I would take control of a situation. Being dominant in any given case came naturally to me. As I grew into a teenager I was never a swooning teenager at no point did I have boy bands decorating my walls. My whole life books were an essential part of who I was. I would read anything that presented itself including romance novels. The submissive women in the stories annoyed me. I always wanted to be the dominant one. If you have never read women romance novels, they are the same setup. There is a strong man that the women could never be with they are thrown together in some form of sexual encounter. The man gives the lead heroine a night she can always remember life breaks them apart and then by the end of the novel they are thrown back together. The couple is expected to live happily ever after.

Even growing up I had issues with how the girls around me viewed sexuality.  Commitment and love were different than sex for me; I expect far more from my partner in life than I demand from a sexual playmate. The first time I felt an attraction towards women came early for me. I did not realize it at the time it was going on. First I thought all girls felt that way towards other women. Even at this age, I remain unconvinced that women do not have crushes towards other women. When it comes to being dominant, there is no difference between women and men for me. I do not know if I would be submissive towards a woman only because that situation has never presented itself.  I do not believe I could feel submissive towards anyone.

I have only dated one man in my life, and the attraction was immediate. He is dominant with everyone but me. We are equals in all areas except one, and that is the bedroom. In the bedroom, I am in control, and he enjoys being under that control. I am not submissive to men I had tried when I was younger I could not appreciate the situation. We have a live-in girlfriend that we have dated for almost 15 years.

Recently, I wrote my first novella Times are Changing, of course, the main character is a strong young woman finding her sexuality. While I have many books planned they will always involve strong women taking control of their partners. I am writing the books that I wish I could have read when I was a younger woman trying to find my sexuality.

Frat Boys

I recently graduated from college with another degree during my stay to finish off this degree the opportunity presented that I could hang out with some frat boys. Through the years I have been around many present and past frat boys. Dressing up as women is often a punishment or hazing that men use against each other.  One of the characters I am working on is a girl who comes from the midwest. She is pulled into a situation that involves teaching frat boy a lesson about how being a woman is not as easy as he believes it to be. I have a friend Kylie Gable who came to be under the control of some women due to inappropriate young man behavior. Through listening to the things these women did to Kylie, it made me wonder what it was like from the woman’s side.

Lindsey my character came out of those stories, the frat boys I had met over the years and my adventures. She is a young midwest girl thrown into a California University.  The rudeness of the boys surrounding her is not something she handles well. At first, she tries to be careful about everything, but after awhile she gets to the end of her patience.

Frat boys are like all men they enjoy a woman who is controlling most respond best to sensual domination rather than someone who yells at them. Over the years I have noticed a lot of men starting out in college enjoy being placed in a feminine situation as long as it not in their control to be there.  The games their brothers play on them of having to wear clothing that is considered female while meant to be degrading are often empowering for later years.  Some men throughout the years have told me their feminine adventures started with events that happened in high school and college.  Panties and bras are often the starting points that take humiliated frat boys to the next step in the adventure.

Frat boys would never let on to the men they live with that the feel of women’s clothing is not humiliating but something that turns them on.  When men are young, it is common for them to purchase outfits then purge them out of a range of emotions.  When I was young, I could never understand why men of their late teens and early twenties would go along with having to wear clothing while their friends made fun of them. Now that I am older it is understandable that the humiliation is a sexual turn on.  The dress is part of the process that causes an adrenaline rush. While most frat boys probably do not think about the situation creating a sexual rush for their buddies in the end sometimes that is the result of hazing.

Who Is Raven Hill

I did not wake up one morning and decide today I will start writing erotica. I have been working on these characters for a couple of years. Many great people have helped me along the way. Writing is something I have always done just not fiction that is something new.  It started out with writing mp3 scripts; these are a ton of fun. After I had spent a couple of years creating short scripts about different fetishes and scenarios my mind started to create characters. Every woman out there has spent hours reading romance novels, and I am one of those women. I was never happy with the women in the traditional romance writings. I am a dominant person, and I craved to read about women who were strong while being in control yet still acted like women. These thought processes led to some different characters forming in my mind. Raven Hills was not the first character I formulated. I started with a couple of other women that I will be writing about soon.

Raven Hills is fun for me. She is a young woman in her early twenties starting to find herself sexually. Raven was raised on a ranch around men. She does not have the same hang-ups that a lot of girls her age tend to have. Ginger is the best friend of the powerful girl and one of her first lovers. They still enjoy each others company but on a casual fun level. Neither Ginger nor Raven is a lesbian,  they both enjoy men and each woman wants a partnership, though it varies in how it will come to pass. Her circle of people is small due to the ranch being a distance from a larger city.  Being raised by men, Raven is fierce in how she conquers a situation. Having lived her life on a ranch around strong creatures taught her how to best utilizes her surroundings to get where she wants to be.  Raven has worked hard to raise her own breed of working beautiful creatures her horses. Her drive to take men and create her version of strong submissive men ties into the creation of her horses.  She has her faults just like every other human out there.  Raven’s age will come into play as her story unfolds it will be up to her to utilize her natural power to overcome the obstacles in her way.  While I have a plan for her through the book. I can not plan out everything in the chapter I am currently working on “There Is Always Denver” the plan has already changed. As I write it is fun to relax so that Raven can go where she wants.  Together we can explore how Raven builds her stable of submissive men and where her sexual adventure takes her in other areas of her life.

What You didn’t know

A little about me. I am in my forties and probably more happy now than I have ever been at any other point in my life. I live on 15 acres with my husband and our girlfriend of 15 years Chilly Hicks.  I have never been a city girl the thought of crowds stress me out. We started our first business in 2007 at that time I was not sure how I or others would react to us working in the adult industry. Through the years I have learned a lot. First off women like myself who work in the adult industry are some of the smartest, toughest women one could meet. We build a business teach ourselves everything and take a lot of crap that we should never have to deal with. Second, off I have met some awesome people in generally sure there are jerks, but you get that everywhere. Third I am dominant I can not play the submissive, and I can not deal with subjects I do not enjoy.

Writing for me has always been comfortable in high school I was one of those people that wrote term papers for extra cash. There were more than a few jocks who would not have graduated if it was not for me. I had never written fiction before starting my own business. It started out with writing scripts from mp3 or shorts for other works we were producing. About four years ago I decided I wanted to start writing in erotica. There were things in the way of that, and the timing was not right. I wanted to finish off a degree first, so I went back to school took the classes I needed and some creative writing classes.  I started on some story ideas during this time but did not get a lot finished. Now I am free to write what I want and how I want.

I am a reader of course and have read a lot of things that are self-published. There is a considerable amount of hard to read and follow writing out there. I want to publish real stories with strong women as the main character.  My main goal is to write something that makes you the reader want to read more. There needs to be a connection with the main character or maybe a side character without that connection there is no desire to come back for more. When it comes to the erotic scenes, I have read a number of the same things you have I understand that writers tend to speed through them. We read erotica for the graphic nature and spending time during that interaction makes the work something we want to revisit.

I hope that you will join me on this journey. Feel free to interact with me and offer suggestions. Our lives should always be based on growing who we are and exploring what we enjoy.

Pantyhose Destruction

Pantyhose destruction fascination or fetish comes in some different ways. Some men enjoy having women wear nylons for them. There are men that enjoy wearing pantyhose themselves. A smaller number of men are into the destruction of pantyhose.  They enjoy the way the nylon feels as it slowly rips. Watching the runs start to form, and the strands start to stretch until it gives way to the pull on each side. Most people are not aware, but pantyhose have a smell that comes from the nylon particles being separated. When it comes to specific fetishes such as pantyhose destruction the details are the most critical part. Sounds, smells, sight all play into the turn on for the person with the fetish.

Through the years I have talked in depth with some men who all enjoy variations of this type of play. Generally, it starts with innocent events of no sexual nature. These events can be brushing up against a pantyhose covered leg to snag it and cause a run. This simple act of accidental destruction can start a chain reaction to a fetish. Pantyhose destruction evokes a sense of euphoric pleasure through the course of demolishing the nylon.  Destruction of pantyhose can be compared to popping balloons or bubbles.  The sexual side of it is complicated in how it presents and unique to each person.

Women destroying pantyhose while men watch there is often a layer of a power play. The men are forced to sit there while their favorite article of clothing torn to pieces.  Most often it is playful a tease and denial of what is allowed.  The women wear a silky pair of hose enabling the men to stroke their legs. The fun part comes when a man gets worked up then told to sit. The men generally do not enjoy the destruction process they enjoy buildup and tease. In the end, the sexual portion comes into play when the men do what the woman asks to attempt to save their favorite pair of hose.

Pantyhose destruction involving men and women can also come with the role play of passion. Think about the romance novel scene where a man passionately grabs a woman and tears her pantyhose off.  It takes people out of the healthy sexuality and adds a level of spice to a night.

There are a number of fetishes that invoke a level of misunderstanding. Pantyhose destruction has an element often misunderstood by people who have never experienced it. Having been exposed to this fetish along with other fetishes, it is fun to play with. I enjoy power play situations especially those that evoke a man to be uncomfortable.  Two people can appreciate each other’s differences, and both enjoy the moment even if they do not share the same fetishes.