Category Archives: Fetishes

Tied In Pantyhose Vs Tied In Ropes

There are many types of dominant women and just as many types of submissive men.  When it comes to men that enjoy being feminization the thought of ropes is probably not something they wish to explore.  Women who enjoy placing men in situations where their manhood is stripped away would never dream of using ropes.  Tying someone in firm white cotton rope, while a common practice in BDSM is about removing the ability of movement and pushing someone towards objectification.  Feminization, on the other hand, is about taking away manhood and pushing a man towards more thinking not less.  Women like myself desire a man to concentrate on the details. We want a man to notice how the fabric feels against his skin. The smell of the female products changes how a man starts to see himself.  In other BDSM situations, it is more about taking things away then adding things to. Men in high power often want to have things taken away control, sensations, and decisions.  I have played on both sides of this it is enjoyable for me to take apart and also to push boundaries. I often put this experience in the expression of “sometimes in life we push, and sometimes we pull.” I pull men towards feminization and push them towards submission.

When we tie a man up in pantyhose, we are pulling him towards feminization. Pantyhose are deceptive in what can be accomplished with them. On the first touch, pantyhose can seem very delicate, and in the single layer, they are fragile.  Placing a man in pantyhose making him wear them is a reminder of how the fabric feels. Nylons are silky when brushed one way, but if swept the opposite they are scratchy.  Wearing hose all night letting a man play with them, hear them touch against themselves, and the smell that is unique can be a tease situation.  Taking a man home to brush those hose against the skin makes the skin more sensitive. Then taking those pantyhose to use them in tying a man up. He thought he was going to be allowed to use his penis. In feminization, the most important step is removing the power of the penis. Pantyhose are lovely for taking a man to a new state of mind of being a feminized playtoy. Those soft silky hose are beautiful in that they are strong when utilized to keep a man in awkward positions.

If I want a man to step out of his head, I will tie him up with rope. On the other hand, if my complete desire to have a man tangled up in his mind nylons become the proper choice. The more he struggles in trying to get away the tighter those bindings become. Rope the knots stay fairly loose a person can work to get themselves out of them at least the kind we utilize during BDSM play. Pantyhose knots increase in tightness the more one pulls against them. I will always have scissors on hand but only use them at my discretion.

Role Play Vs Real Play

I am a lifestyler, so that means I have done both real play and role play. Real play and role play are both fun and sexually stimulating. Humans need the mental aspect of sexuality. The physical point of being touched by someone is not what creates an intense orgasm. It is the tease that builds up the intensity of how we react to a partner. Humans are complicated yet simple. Think about the first time you were involved in a sexual interaction. Most of us have a long time of trying to get from one aspect of sexuality to another. The whole baseball comparison of first base, second base, and the home run it cliche but explains the tease/denial aspect.  I have had people tell me there is no connection between role play and real play that is untrue. I have had a real play that was disappointing. There has been roleplaying over the years in which the orgasm was intense. It is the interaction of the people involved and how much they invest into the situation that determines its outcome.

Read an article on marriage and ti will tell people that sex gets better for people involved in a relationship. Being in a relationship can be great, or it can be horrid. Over the years people have told me they do not share the kinks with their partner about the intriguing fantasies they have. I would not want to be with someone I could not open up to.  If a person is in a relationship that offers sexual exploration, then it would be great for sexuality. If a person feels the need to hide certain parts of who they are then they will withdraw from the relationship and sexuality will suffer.  It is not necessary for my mind to have a romantic relationship to have a sexual relationship. I have played with several people over the years who I enjoyed but would not have wanted to spend every day in the company of.

When it comes to role play (I am defining this as two people in two different locations in this instance) in my experience, this can be just as wonderful if not more so than real play. Over the years I have talked to some fun individuals even though we were hundred if not thousand of miles our play time proved to be sexually stimulating.  After being around human sexuality of people, I do not have an intimate daily relationship with I have discovered there can be role play that is intense.  I have some people that I have talked to for over eleven years they have shared with me intimate, deep parts of their life. I know more about them then their stream of significant other through all that time. While we may not have the daily connection due to our strict relationship limited by circumstances the understanding of sexuality is intense. Most of the time these fetishes are innocent. A lot of men are into panties, pantyhose, being tied up, or different roles where women are in control. I enjoy hearing about them, and it saddens me in a lot of ways to think they do not have a level of comfort to share. Explore the parts of yourself even if you are not sure how it will be received understand that many have already traveled that road. Be yourself be open and surround yourself with people who adore you for you, not for your sexuality.

Pantyhose Destruction

Pantyhose destruction fascination or fetish comes in some different ways. Some men enjoy having women wear nylons for them. There are men that enjoy wearing pantyhose themselves. A smaller number of men are into the destruction of pantyhose.  They enjoy the way the nylon feels as it slowly rips. Watching the runs start to form, and the strands start to stretch until it gives way to the pull on each side. Most people are not aware, but pantyhose have a smell that comes from the nylon particles being separated. When it comes to specific fetishes such as pantyhose destruction the details are the most critical part. Sounds, smells, sight all play into the turn on for the person with the fetish.

Through the years I have talked in depth with some men who all enjoy variations of this type of play. Generally, it starts with innocent events of no sexual nature. These events can be brushing up against a pantyhose covered leg to snag it and cause a run. This simple act of accidental destruction can start a chain reaction to a fetish. Pantyhose destruction evokes a sense of euphoric pleasure through the course of demolishing the nylon.  Destruction of pantyhose can be compared to popping balloons or bubbles.  The sexual side of it is complicated in how it presents and unique to each person.

Women destroying pantyhose while men watch there is often a layer of a power play. The men are forced to sit there while their favorite article of clothing torn to pieces.  Most often it is playful a tease and denial of what is allowed.  The women wear a silky pair of hose enabling the men to stroke their legs. The fun part comes when a man gets worked up then told to sit. The men generally do not enjoy the destruction process they enjoy buildup and tease. In the end, the sexual portion comes into play when the men do what the woman asks to attempt to save their favorite pair of hose.

Pantyhose destruction involving men and women can also come with the role play of passion. Think about the romance novel scene where a man passionately grabs a woman and tears her pantyhose off.  It takes people out of the healthy sexuality and adds a level of spice to a night.

There are a number of fetishes that invoke a level of misunderstanding. Pantyhose destruction has an element often misunderstood by people who have never experienced it. Having been exposed to this fetish along with other fetishes, it is fun to play with. I enjoy power play situations especially those that evoke a man to be uncomfortable.  Two people can appreciate each other’s differences, and both enjoy the moment even if they do not share the same fetishes.

Ball Busting/CBT (Cock And BAll Torture)

This is one of my favorite ways to play. I have been playing with cock and balls for a very long time. One of my favorite ways is to tie them up and stretch them out. If you have bought some of my movies you have probably seen some of the cock cages, ball seperators, ball stretchers and other toys that are in my collection. I have to say though that metal and rope are two of my most favorite things to play with. I like how metal starts out cold then warms up to the same temperature as skin.  I have a number of metal eye hooks in my bedroom and a number of pulleys to use as stretching mechanisms. Tease and denial is one of my favorite games to play.  I have a number of guys that think about this kind of fun but their significant others do not want to play.  I even talk to a number of guys that are into being kicked in the balls.  They like the feel of the instant pain and the feel of complete loss of control. Most of the time this comes from a guy that has been kicked by girls when they were younger. The loss of control is what makes the ongoing fantasy appealing for most guys that feeling of being pushed further than they would ever want to go. There are a number of guys that are not into pain they are into the fantasy of the pain. They do not want to be kicked violently in the balls but they do want to talk about it. That is the great thing about phone sex. We can explore a lot of things that would get way to intense with a real life mistress. I do have some guys that are into smacking themselves over and over again in the testicles.  If a guy calls me and tells me he wants to have a fantasy then I can certaintly understand the difference. If there is something you are into don’t be afraid to call and talk about. We can take it as far as you want or as a mild as you want. The important thing is opening up and telling me what you are wanting to discuss. I have played and enjoy playing in real life. However, I greatly enjoy having a fantasy and the most fun a person can have is in their own mind.

BDSM/Domination

This is the new buzz thing with all the girls and I am sure some guys reading Fifty Shades of Grey. I will confess I have not read the books yet. While I have read a ton of other books on the subject I have not got around to these yet. I am sure I will at some point just because of curiosity of the fuss. I am happy that they are allowing a lot of people to open up about their fantasies and explore who they are in a lot of ways. While this is a jump point from what I have gathered this book of fiction is not really even close to the reality of a submissive and dominate relationship. That is perfectly okay I know a lot of people are criticizing the book, but I am sure we all understand that an a work of fiction is not reality. If it does start people going hey I might like this and start talking about it that is quite alright. I have been in the bdsm lifestyle since I was in my late teens so I have been exposed to a lot. I will say for me it is more sensual domination as apposed to hard core pain. I like the tease and the taunt of having someone tied up. I like someone who wants to please me. I really have no desire to break someone. That is why if you talk to me you will hear me say I would rather be a goddess that a mistress any day. For some women and men they want someone to break them they want someone to take their will away from them and leave them in a state that there is no longer a choice for what they will do. That is fine I understand that want and that complete loss of control and power. Neither way is the “right” way as there is no right or wrong with this lifestyle just differences of wants and desires. From the discussions I have gathered on Fifty Shades of Grey that is the just of the book and there is nothing wrong with that fantasy. I just feel that people should understand the whole thing is a fantasy. The life of bdsm and domination is one that can be explored however the two people involved wish to make it happen and it does not have to follow specific rules others than those set within the relationship itself.

Ass Worship

When  a lady like myself has a big round bottom of the first things that comes up with a large number of men is ass worship. They so want to touch it, kiss it, and have it hovering over their face. Yes, I do enjoy having my butt worshipped in numerous ways. I have to say laying down and having a man put little kisses all over my bottom and then licking my tight hole is very nice. I have always enjoyed a pair of strong large hands messaging my bottom will I relax under neath their touch. However, when I am in the mood to take control that is when I shove them down on the bed and climb on their face. I like to take my hands and spread those cheeks nice and wide before I push their face in between them. I am expecting them to kiss and lick that ass hole and crack very well. In fact if I do not thing they are doing a very good job I just might sit down on that face and smother them. Sometimes the biggest motivation for a man is not being able to breath. It always amazes me how he will start being more in tune with his job when he must do a good job to get a breath.  Motivation is what a number of men need including having their penises made and kept hard while they completely take care of me first. I really enjoy making a man wear a collar and running a leash between my legs while pulling him right into my ass cheeks. That is right where his face belongs he does not need to see nor think about anything but that bottom right in front of him. When he starts realizing that his job is whatever I demand of him things quickly change and he starts to want to make me happy in every way.  One of the questions I am often asked is if I can orgasm from ass worship. Yes, I can orgasm from having my ass licked, teased, and enjoyed. Actually some of the hardest orgasms I have had have come from this activity.

So tell me in the comments is this something you do? Or perhaps you have always wanted to do it but your girl was not into it. I would greatly in joy hearing your stories.

Bondage And The Devices Used

I have been in the BDSM world since I first became an adult. My first bondage type toys were all handmade. I am honestly thinking of doing a video on how to make a bondage kit from a hardware store.  There are so many things that people enjoy using. I will do in depth discussions on all these subjects at a later time. Most people start out in bondage with whatever is laying around the house. The pantyhose used on a late night of drinking is commonly used. There is nothing wrong with this I actually enjoy pantyhose play but I strongly encourage having scissors close at hand. Having to find a pair that you forgot where you put while someone’s body parts are turning purple can very much ruin a moment. Rope is another thing we commonly use. There are good types of rope and really terrible types of rope which we will discuss a lot more in a later time. I personally enjoy rope over all things used.  A lot of people enjoy handcuffs I own a number of different types of handcuffs even though these are the least of my favorites. There are regular handcuffs the type all cops seem to care. There are hinged cuffs which are not as commonly seen but very popular in law enforcement when they have an unruly person. Leather cuffs are also another favorite of mine. I like that you can put someone in leather cuffs for an extended amount of time without having to worry about blood supply. I strongly caution against playing with bondage and using extra curricular things such as drugs or alcohol. A lot of people do not realize how close they are to passing out and if you do that while someone is bound up that could be a very bad deal. If you want to play with rope, pantyhose or something else that can get tighter the more struggle is applied you need to make sure you fully understand how to remove these quickly before you need to remove them quickly. Handcuffs come equipped with a locking system learn how to use this in an efficient manner before you put them on someone else. If you are using something with a lock make sure you know where the key is before you snap that onto someone. I know these seem so simple but so many people forget these simple things and end up having to get help embarrassing themselves and their partners and ruining what could be a wonderful experience.

Humiliation

I talk to a number of guys about the concept of humiliation. Most of these men are successful in their daily lives.  They have great jobs, families, and are over all balanced people. Almost all of them ask at some point ‘I do not know why I am into humiliation or why it turns me on so much’ If they have been in a situation where it was an ongoing humiliation they will often say something along the lines of I did not enjoy it while it was happening. Yet after they have been through this a couple of times they start to crave that. Of course, this is all about the chemical process in the brain. These stressful situations cause certain chemicals to be released by us. It is not the situation we crave but the natural high we get on the other side of it.

I have had a number of men tell me they start to need those feelings again. That the way they felt was better than most orgasms they have had sexual contact including masturbation. This makes sense to me because sex is mainly about the mental process and only a small portion of it is physical. With humiliation along with other submissive acts because we are in charge of the situation we do not have the guilt of what is happening to us. It almost frees someone to be allowed to enjoy something to a higher degree.

Someone like myself who enjoys being in charge of a what is happening has a deeper understanding of this process.  If a person is doing this to another it is often done out of spite at least initially. No one likes to be shamed at least not the first time. It is not the shaming they want but the release they get from how the brain reacts to it. For myself, I always keep this in mind with Niteflirt play or other types of adult play. The build up is all about the mental portion at the end. The control of how that build up happens and the degree helps to determine the chemical dump at the end.

This is one of the reasons I try and get to know someone it helps me make their experience more intense. Humiliation is an area of sexuality where us being in different parts of the world works really well. The reason for this is due to how much of it is about tapping into something that has already occurred. Putting a person into that feeling they once had then helped them work back through that in a controlled way is also a healthy way to own a situation that once was extremely painful.

If humiliation is something that you think you might be interested in or if you just want to talk out a situation you do not talk about with others. Give me a call!

 

Bondage Wrestling

Bondage wresting is something I honestly knew nothing about till about six months ago. I had a caller ask me if I had ever heard of it nope not at all. He then sent me a few youtube links to take a quick peek at. I can understand why a lot of guys and girls would be interested in it. For those that are not familiar with it the concept is pretty simple. It starts out like any other wrestling except for two very important items put in the ring. These can be traditional metal handcuffs, plastic zip strips or more commonly two pieces of rope. The whole point is to get your opponent tied up and immobilize them. After that it can become any number of scenarios. It can just be a fun time of tag your it. There can be a bit of female on male domination which is what I hear more about. I know a lot of guys have a fantasy of a woman over powering them. There is also a lot of guys that are into having a woman “beat them up” while this can go to the extreme of drawing blood or just being banged around till they give up. While most of the time bondage wrestling has limitations to what can and can not be done in some ways this makes it safer for a man who wants to explore this side of his sexuality. A lot of times there is no hard core sexual contact but in most bdsm it is not the end game that is important to someone. The buildup is far more sexually gratifying because it lasts for an extended amount of time. I have talked to a number of men who were in real life situations where women over powered them and those are where their fantasies go again and again. If you want to explore your need to be tied and teased we can explore that together.

Forced Bi

You may have noticed that forced bi has left a lot of girls descriptions. That is due to a lot fo sites making us take those words down. I have played with bi play for almost twenty years now. I enjoy having a man do things for me that he would not do on his own. Forced bi is just a search term that makes it easy for men to find women who enjoy taking control of a situation. They look for a woman that will treat them in a way that makes them want to push their boundaries. In all reality, you can not force someone to do something of this nature without their wanting to be there at some level.

It is not about being homosexual it is about being pushed into a situation that is uncomfortable. That unsettled feeling is a huge turn on for a number of people. The butterfly’s they get in their stomach as they realize they are going to do something for someone they would never do on their own. They want to please the woman in every way. Submission is giving of one’s self completely over to another. It is also about trust. Forced bi situations are all about trust. There is nothing more destructive than a person giving themselves in ways they never would other wise, and then having someone use those actions against them. I have spoken to men over the years who’s girlfriends would turn these instances against them in very cutting ways.

I want a person who gives themselves to me and does what I ask when I desire it. I do not want to force someone in a physcial way I enjoy the mental play between partners. I desire to have a man that goes above and beyond to give me parts of himself that he has never given someone else. The more uncomfortable he the more fulfilled I am.