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Brat Needs Punished In BDSM Relationships

When we are discussing the interaction between a mistress and a submissive there are some submissives who feel the need to push their mistress to the point where she must punish them. This requires a Mistress who has a lot of patience to deal with a personality that is constantly making her life difficult. Generally this type of personality is not playful and fun. The Brat is often a person who is dramatic in personality. They want to push people to the point of having them blow up with emotion. Often after a blow up the brat will then act as if they are the victim in the situation. This is far from the reality of the situation in that they set up scenario and played it out how they desired it to go. A Brat often does not understand being a willing submissive. Their actions can come out of the guilt of being submissive they want someone to force them so they are not responsible for their actions. Some Brats just enjoy trying to get the upper hand on the Mistress they may never actually intend to do it but they like the rush of almost getting there.

For a Mistress especially a new one just starting out this can be an intense frustrating situation. If she has little understanding of the mental game being played it can cause her to doubt her ability to rule her submissive. I have personally known a few Mistresses who’s first interactions were with Brats and ultimately they were their lasts. While a Brat may see this as something that is fun in the end it often backfires on them. Through the years I have spoken with numerous men who tell me of the ONE submissive relationship they have been in where after the fact they saw what they were doing. For a Mistress like myself I have no want to deal with this type of behavior. I want a willing submissive one who wants nothing more than to make me happy no matter what I ask. I have had a few submissive women who played this game and for me it emotionally exhausting. I soon grew bored with this type of submissive. I dumped them quickly with no want to have them in my life at any level. A Brat needs to make it very clear to the Mistress what and why they are doing the things they are doing. Without proper communication and both people being on the same level of understanding this situation rarely if ever ends well.

Smart Ass Masochist (SAM)

As a dominant woman I have encountered all kinds of different submissive people. I personally enjoy a sweet daunting submissive. I am not really into inflicting pain to people though I am capable of it with no remorse. As a more seductive and sensual Goddess I tend to get annoyed by SAM’s. A SAM is someone that enjoys causing problems to the point that they are punished. This is the male equivalent to a brat. They go out of their way to annoy their Mistress or Master. They intentionally do things that they know will enrage their dominant partner. This is not part of a play session. It is more of  drama look at me and then punish me thing. For dominant people that enjoy just being overly aggressive and punishing incessantly it might be enjoyable. For those of us that enjoy the more sensual side of things it quickly loses the appeal and boredom of the situation sets in. SAM’s are not about pleasing someone they are instead about making someone irritated to the point of angry then acting like they do not understand what the problem is. In a lot of ways they are extremely passive aggressive to the degree of blaming the dominant person. I have seen SAM’s do things like blaming the dominant person for everything and saying such statements as ‘I can never do anything right’  or ‘you always find fault in me’. A person on the outside of the situation can easily identify that the submissive person is breaking rules in order to illicit a response then becoming upset at the response.  This can be a very upsetting relationship for a dominant as they are trying to create stability and SAM’s are always trying to undo that stability. It tends to not be a loving relationship but more of pull of power back and forth with the use of guilt as the main determinating factor. For a dominant person that is just looking for a way to punish someone they might find some enjoyment out of this. For most dominant people it is a dangerous situation to be involved in. With a loving submissive/dominant relationship there is always that understanding of what the submissive is wanting. In a SAM relationship that level of security is missing.  Most dominant people including myself avoid these types of relationships because of the level of frustration and the degree of insecurity of the submissive’s actual position.