The Degrees of BDSM

This is something I have personally dealt with in my life. It is important to understand that who we are submissively and who we are dominantly are personal choices. Lots of things go into the make up of our final outcome. I am dominant but I also enjoy pleasing others I want the people around me to be happy. I want my submissives to come to me willing. I do not have the patience to “break” someone. I personally think that BDSM is all about the submissives pleasure. For me teasing someone to the breaking point and then giving them the ultimate orgasm of their life is always my end goal. I might get there over hours, days or sometimes even months. I enjoy sex greatly and I enjoy having sex with SOME of my submissive men. I have been told that a mistress never has sex with her partners. I have actually been thrown off of bondage sites because I talk about it. This is just wrong to me. Our lives and our identities should be our own to live as we see fit. Our play partners are the only people that truly matter.  Some Mistress are completely hard core and I personally have no issues with that. I know there are submissives who enjoy being broken. I know there are submissives who crave a woman that does not think of them at all. There is nothing wrong with who you are. You just need to communicate this to those around. Being clear with what we expect and what we demand is what builds strong relationships. In all relationships expecting someone to “get” your needs is always going to end badly. People do not do well with reading clues it is not something we are taught to do as children and it gets more complicated when we become adults. The degrees of bdsm in my opinion are self set and the only way to find someone who is at the same level is to tell them of your level. I talk to so many people that want things done most the time these are very easy to accommodate but they are so afraid of rejection they will not communicate these desires with those close to them. Instead they reach out to a stranger because a stranger rejects are less hurtful then those they are emotionally indebted to.

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